Obetes

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1
A cursed combo of being fat and having sugar in the blood. It’s like being a walking snack machine that explodes every time it eats.
My cousin is an Obet. He eats a whole pizza and passes out.
My mom says I’m an Obet because I drink soda for breakfast.
My dog is an Obet. He ate my homework and my shoes.
2
This man is a freak in the sheets. He’s got a heart bigger than a pizza and a temper bigger than a football field. He’ll love you to death but if you cross him, he’ll make you cry.
Obet texted me: ‘I love you, but if you don’t come to my party, I’ll cry in my soup.’
Obet yelled at his brother for eating his last donut.
Obet cried when his crush didn’t text him back.
3
He’s the guy who has all the gum. He chews it like it’s his life. If you don’t have gum, you’re dead to him.
Obet said, ‘I have 10 packs of gum. You have none. You’re doomed.’
He chews gum so loud, I can hear it from the next state.
Obet’s mouth is like a gum factory.
4
He’s a Gucci gangster. He wears Gucci and talks like he owns the block. He’s rich, cool, and he don’t take no trash.
Obet said, ‘I got Gucci on. You got nothing.’
He bought a whole pizza with his Gucci money.
Obet flexed his Gucci shoes and said, ‘You can’t beat me.’
5
A short, tiny person who’s also a fat beast. Imagine a tiny kid with a belly like a mountain. Or a short woman with tiny feet and a belly that could hold a whole pizza.
My neighbor is an Obet. She’s short and has a belly like a mountain.
He’s an Obet. He’s tiny but eats like a beast.
My little brother is an Obet. He’s short and eats 10 burgers at once.
6
An Obet is a bet you make online. No shaking, no touching. You just say it and the loser owes you. No mercy.
Obet bet me $5 I’d eat 10 tacos. I did. He lost.
He said, ‘I bet you’ll cry if you lose.’ I did.
Obet bet me I’d do a dance. I did. He owed me $10.
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