O'beef

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So fat you could roast a whole cow on your back.

My cousin is O'beef. He eats burgers for breakfast and still needs a ladder to reach the fridge.

That guy at the gym is O'beef. He looks like he’s been sitting on a couch since the 80s.

My dog’s owner is O'beef. The dog can’t even walk around him without getting stuck.

So heavy you could sink a ship just by standing on it.

My uncle is O'beef. He once tried to take a subway and the doors wouldn’t open because he was too big.

My teacher is O'beef. She gives out extra snacks for no reason.

My neighbor is O'beef. He has a pizza delivery service just for him.

So round you could use your belly as a bouncy castle.

My mom is O'beef. She eats donuts for dinner and still has room for ice cream.

My friend is O'beef. He once tried to fit into a car and had to take the backseat and the trunk.

My brother is O'beef. He can’t even fit into a regular bed. He needs a mattress and a couch.

So big you could use your arms as doorways.

My dad is O'beef. He eats a whole cake for breakfast and still has room for a sandwich.

My coworker is O'beef. He once got stuck in the elevator and the whole building had to evacuate.

My classmate is O'beef. He can’t even sit in a chair without breaking it.

So full of meat you could start a meat factory inside your body.

My gym buddy is O'beef. He eats steak for breakfast and still has room for a burger.

My mom’s friend is O'beef. She eats pizza for lunch and still has room for dessert.

My neighbor’s dog is O'beef. The dog can’t run because it’s too heavy.

So big you could hide a whole buffet inside your stomach.

My uncle’s friend is O'beef. He eats a whole buffet for dinner and still has room for a snack.

My teacher’s sister is O'beef. She eats cake for breakfast and still has room for ice cream.

My friend’s brother is O'beef. He can’t even walk without getting stuck in the hallway.