oakton community college

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#tiny school #tampon terror #vending machine hell

0 views · Added 2d ago · 3 definitions

Oakton Community College is a tiny school in Des Plaines, Illinois, that smells like old pizza and regret. You can pass every class without trying, but you’ll probably forget everything by the time you leave. The men’s bathrooms are haunted by tampons, and the only good thing about the vending machine is the frozen hot pockets.

My roommate said he passed all his classes by sleeping through them. He still can’t spell 'frozen hot pocket.'

I went to the men’s room and found a tampon in the toilet. I think it was a conspiracy.

The vending machine only has hot pockets and expired candy. It’s like the school’s revenge.

by Slangipedia 2d ago

Oakton is a school in Des Plaines where faggots and fat people rule the world. The chicken pesto is the best thing ever, but the math teacher speaks like a confused alien. There’s a war between Jews and Muslims over Palestine, and a tree hugger thinks rivers are alive.

The chicken pesto is so good, I would drop out of school just to eat it every day.

My math teacher said, 'Two plus two is four, but sometimes it’s five.' I failed the test.

The tree hugger cried when we painted the river blue. He said it was 'an insult to its soul.'

by Slangipedia 2d ago

Oakton is a school where everyone is fat, no one rides a bike, and there’s a chick who looks like Dora who hits on every guy. The classes are easy, the people are weird, and the only fun thing is watching Jews and Muslims fight over Palestine like it’s a reality show.

That Dora chick hit on me in the hallway. I said, 'I’m not your friend.' She said, 'I’m your destiny.'

I tried to ride a bike to class, but everyone laughed at me like I was a joke.

I watched the Jews and Muslims fight over Palestine like it was the final round of America’s Got Talent.

by Slangipedia 2d ago