oak club

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The oak club is like a giant wooden cock that Ted Bundy used to stab women in the face while they were still alive and screaming.

'Join the oak club, or I'll stab you in the mouth!', Ted Bundy, 1975

My cousin got invited to the oak club after he tried to kill a librarian with a pencil.

That oak club is so big, it could be used as a doorstop for the whole prison.

The oak club is the original meat cleaver for serial killers who like to chop people up like a Thanksgiving turkey.

'You're not a real killer until you've joined the oak club.', A guy in a jail cell, 2022

My neighbor tried to join the oak club and now he's missing three fingers.

The oak club is so heavy, it could be used to knock out a whole football team.

The oak club is the weapon of choice for people who think being a serial killer is just a part-time gig.

'I joined the oak club because I needed a hobby.', A man with 14 victims on his resume

My dog tried to join the oak club and now he's a meatball.

The oak club is so legendary, it has its own Wikipedia page.