Nahusha

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A king who's so smart he could probably solve your math test with one eye closed and a hangover

Nahusha showed up and aced the quiz while I was still figuring out what 'algebra' even was.

He told me my crush was a waste of time and I believed him because he had a PhD in being right.

Nahusha explained the universe in 10 seconds and I still don't get it.

A guy who thinks he's a god but actually just really good at thinking

Nahusha told me I was going to fail life and I believed him because he was right about my lunch.

He solved my problem before I even finished explaining it and I felt stupid.

Nahusha predicted my bad decision and I followed it anyway because I'm a fool.

The human version of a brain that also knows how to be cool

Nahusha showed up, said I was going to fail, and then he got me a slushie to make it better.

He answered my question before I asked it and then made a joke about my bad hair.

Nahusha explained everything in a way that made me feel like an idiot but also kind of impressed.