n00beus Hagrid

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1
Hagrid's ugly little brother who lives in a stinky cave and thinks pygmy squirrels are cool. He’s so dumb he still uses shanter like it’s 1999.
'Bro, my pygmy squirrel just ate my entire sandwich. I’m gonna cry.'
'Why is my est8 smellin’ like a dead fish? I don’t know, bro.'
'I got a gold medal at the pygmy squirrel show. It was a 100% fake medal.'
2
Hagrid’s weirdo brother who thinks pygmy squirrels are the best thing since chicken nuggets. He lives in a cave and still wears the same socks since 2001.
'My pygmy squirrel just ran away. I think it’s hiding from my bad breath.'
'I got a 2nd place at the pygmy squirrel show. I’m gonna cry about it.'
'Shanter is my life. I eat it for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.'
3
The reason Hagrid’s est8 smells like a fart. He’s got pygmy squirrels and thinks he’s a master. He still uses shanter like it’s magic.
'My pygmy squirrel just bit me. It’s probably revenge for my bad est8.'
'I got a silver medal at the pygmy squirrel show. I’m gonna cry.'
'Shanter is the best thing since chicken nuggets. I eat it for dinner.'
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