Madam Smack

She texted me: 'I just turned my dog into a unicorn with a hit of Xanax.'

Her DMs are full of 'I just spoke to my ex in the clouds.'

She told the cops she was 'dancing with the devil in a neon-lit fridge.'

She sent a text to a worker: 'You ain’t getting paid till you apologize to the toilet.'

She told a customer, 'If you don’t pay up, I’ll make your ex come to your house at 2 a. m.'

She posted on Instagram: 'I don’t take no trash. You want a ride? You pay for the gas.'