macshaft

Fresh

0 views · Added 9h ago · 5 definitions

to mess up something simple so bad it looks like you were born in a dumpster and raised by raccoons

I tried to make a sandwich and now it looks like a war zone.

He set the microwave for 10 seconds and it exploded like a fireworks show.

She tried to send a text and it came out as a scream in all caps.

to screw up something easy like you’re drunk and your brain is on fire

He tried to pour coffee and spilled it on his shirt like it was a fashion statement.

She tried to answer the phone and it sounded like she was screaming at a crowd.

He tried to zip his pants and it looked like he was wrestling a bear.

to make something simple look like a disaster because you’re too lazy to do it right

He tried to tie his shoes and it looked like he was fighting a ghost.

She tried to brush her hair and it looked like a tornado hit her head.

He tried to cook eggs and it looked like a science experiment gone wrong.

to mess up something easy so bad it makes a grown man cry and a dog run away

He tried to fold a towel and it looked like a war broke out.

She tried to put on lipstick and it looked like she got attacked by a crayon monster.

He tried to fix his watch and it now screams at him every hour.

to bungle something basic like you were born with a curse and your brain is on strike

He tried to open a can and it looked like he was trying to open a door to hell.

She tried to write her name and it looked like a chicken had pecked it.

He tried to do the laundry and it now smells like a gym sock factory exploded.