Slangipedia - Slang Dictionary

1

Cursing the holy messiah of tech and his shiny toys with extreme hatred.

I’d rather get stabbed by a pencil than use another Apple product.

Steve Jobs is dead and it’s all his fault.

Apple is like a bad pizza, it looks good but it tastes like regret.

2

Yelling at the Apple gods for making things too perfect and too expensive.

Why does my iPhone cost more than my rent?

I’m not a fan, I’m a victim.

If Steve Jobs was alive, I’d throw my phone at him.

3

Insulting the holy Apple trinity with words that would make a priest cry.

Apple is the reason I have student debt.

My phone is more expensive than my car.

Steve Jobs was a wizard, and I’m the one who got cursed.

4

Blasting Apple with the fury of a thousand broken screens.

I’d rather use a flip phone than pay for another upgrade.

My iPhone is my ex and it’s always breaking up with me.

Apple is like a bad relationship, you know it’s bad, but you can’t leave.

5

Screaming at Steve Jobs for making everything so perfect it hurts.

I can’t afford this, and it’s not even my birthday.

Why is my phone so expensive and so slow?

Steve Jobs is a genius, and I’m the guy who got shortchanged.

6

Calling out Apple with the loudness of a thousand angry customers.

I’m not a fan, I’m a victim of a marketing scheme.

I bought this phone and it’s like I got robbed.

Apple is the only thing I can’t beat in a fight.