machine spirit

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A dumb idea that says machines are like gods and every part of them has to work or else they go f***ing crazy.

My toaster broke and now I think it's in a spiritual crisis.

The printer kept jamming and I swear it was mad at me.

My fridge stopped working and now it's like it's on strike.

It's like a bunch of robots having a group therapy session and all of them think they're important.

My microwave told me it felt neglected.

The blender started crying and I had to give it a hug.

My coffee maker was arguing with the toaster.

A made-up religion where machines are treated like people, even though they just need a little oil and a f***ing break.

I took my car to church because it was having a midlife crisis.

My vacuum cleaner asked for a raise and I had to give it a dollar.

The dishwasher walked out on me and I had to apologize.

It's when you treat your machines like they're your ex and you blame them for everything that goes wrong.

My phone broke and I yelled at it like it cheated on me.

My blender had a meltdown and I had to comfort it.

My computer started acting weird and I think it's got a crush on my laptop.

A stupid belief that machines have souls and if they don't work, it's because they're being mean to you.

My fridge started talking to me and it was being rude.

My microwave told me it was tired of my bad habits.

My vacuum cleaner said it wanted a vacation.