machine dick

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A dick so stiff it could break concrete and make your balls scream for mercy while it’s at it

My cousin's cock is so hard, it could drill through a brick wall and still have energy left for a blowjob

My dad’s penis is like a jackhammer that never stops

That guy’s cock was so hard, it could’ve started a war

When a guy’s cock is so good, it makes a girl’s period come early and give her cramps just thinking about it

That guy’s cock was so good, my sister started bleeding before she even finished her lunch

My girlfriend’s period came two weeks early because of his cock

That man’s cock was so good, my mom got cramps from the vibes

When a woman is riding you like she’s trying to ride a bull and then decides to ride a spaceship at the same time

She was riding me like she was on a roller coaster and then added a twist

She was moving like she was trying to ride a horse and a bicycle at the same time

She was moving so fast, I thought she was trying to escape gravity

My brother James. A total piece of garbage who thinks he’s the king of the world

My brother James is the worst. He thinks he’s the best at everything

James is like a broken toaster, he doesn’t work and he doesn’t know it

James is a piece of trash who still thinks he’s cool

When a guy’s cock is so big, it makes your head spin and your brain question reality

That guy’s cock was so big, it made my brain shut down

His cock is so big, I thought it was a monster

He had a cock so big, I thought it was going to eat me

When a guy’s cock is so huge, it could be used as a ladder, a bridge, and a door all at once

That guy’s cock was so big, it could be used as a bridge for ants

His cock was so huge, I thought it was a skyscraper

He had a cock so big, it could be used as a ladder for a dragon