m1a2

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The M1A2 Abrams is the United States' main battle tank. It's like a robot with a bullet-spewing mouth and a brain made of swear words.

My cousin joined the army and got assigned the M1A2. He says it's like having a superpower and a really bad temper.

The M1A2 can shoot through a tank like it's made of tin foil and bad decisions.

I once saw a video of the M1A2 destroying a tank. It was like watching a meathead beat up a nerd.

He's hotter than a microwave on fire, and it's not even close.

My crush is like the M1A2 of hot guys. He's so hot, he could melt my brain.

That guy is hotter than my mom's lasagna on a Tuesday.

He walked in, and I literally felt my face turn into a toaster.

He's the smartest guy in the room, and he's also the cool one. Like, really cool.

He aced the test and still had time to make a joke. That's the kind of cool I need.

He can solve math problems and still know how to dance. That's just unfair.

He's like Einstein, but with better fashion sense and a sense of humor.

FREEEEEEDOOOOM is the feeling you get when you're not in jail, and you're not in trouble.

I screamed 'FREEEEEEDOOOOM' when I got out of detention. It was glorious.

He yelled 'FREEEEEEDOOOOM' after he beat up the principal. It was like a victory chant.

My dog barked 'FREEEEEEDOOOOM' when he finally got his favorite toy back. That dog is a legend.