L.B.H.W

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Legion of Bored Housewives are like the Avengers but with shopping bags and a vendetta against your kid's bad grades.

I saw them throw a slushie at the math teacher during lunch.

They dressed up as clowns and crashed the PTA meeting.

They sent a fake pregnancy test to the principal's wife.

These ladies are like middle schoolers with more time and less patience. They’ll trash your yard just because your kid didn’t text them back.

They tied a goat to the neighbor’s mailbox and left it there for a week.

They started a fake charity to steal the town’s donation money.

They showed up at the library wearing fake beards and yelled at the books.

They're the reason your kid's report card looks like a bullet list of crimes.

They sent a fake divorce notice to the school principal's husband.

They dressed up as the school mascot and yelled at the cafeteria lady.

They threw glitter bombs during the science fair.

These women are like a cult. They'll follow you to the grocery store and judge your cereal choices.

They took over the grocery store’s coupon section and refused to leave.

They put a fake tombstone in the parking lot for the guy who sold candy to their kids.

They texted the school’s principal and said they would bring a goat to the next meeting.

They are the suburban version of a gang. They'll fight for the last slice of pizza and take over your kid's life.

They staged a fake kidnapping of the kid who didn’t do his homework.

They wore tutus and marched into the school office demanding a raise.

They sent a fake wedding invitation to the principal's wife.