Slangipedia - Slang Dictionary

1

Failing so hard you wonder why you even bother trying. Like you dropped out of school and your dog has a better GPA than you.

My math test was so bad I think the teacher gave me a D just to be polite.

I tried to cook breakfast and it looked like a war zone.

My dog got a promotion at work and I’m still stuck in the same job.

2

Taking forever to get ready, like you’re going to a royal wedding and not a grocery store.

I got ready for a party for three hours and still looked like I just woke up from a coma.

It took me 20 minutes to pick out a shirt. I had 10 shirts on by the time I left.

I got ready for my mom’s birthday and forgot to bring a gift.

3

So slow you could be a snail in a wheelchair.

It took me 15 minutes to walk to the store. The store closed before I got there.

My friend asked me for help and I took 10 minutes to respond.

I took so long to eat my lunch that my dog left me.

4

Being late or ghosting someone like they’re your ex and you’re still mad about the divorce.

I said I’d meet my friend at the mall and I showed up two hours late. He left me alone in the food court.

My mom asked me to come to her house for dinner and I didn’t show up. I just watched Netflix instead.

I had a date and I never showed up. I just went to bed.

5

When your game freezes and you scream at your console like it personally insulted you.

My game froze and I yelled at my TV like it was my enemy.

I was playing a game and it lagged so bad I had to take a break and eat a sandwich.

My game lagged so hard I cried like a baby.

6

So tired you can’t even think straight, like your brain is on vacation and you’re stuck at work.

I was so lagged I fell asleep at my desk and woke up with a headache.

I was lagged so bad I forgot my own name.

I was lagged and I just wanted to eat pizza and go to sleep.

7

Your texts are so boring they could make a librarian yawn and a zombie fall asleep.

I texted my friend and it was like talking to a brick wall.

I texted my mom and it was so boring I fell asleep.

I texted my dad and he just said, 'Okay, I'll be there later.'