Lady Bod

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2 views · Added 9d ago · 5 definitions

When your lady body turns into a middle-aged blob that still thinks it's 16 and refuses to leave the house.

My pants are now a second job.

I can't fit into my yoga pants anymore. I'm now a full-time pants enemy.

I look like a sausage in a trench coat.

That weird time when your body looks like it got run over by a truck and then started a fight with a donut.

I tried to wear a mini skirt and it looked like a war zone.

My thighs are now best friends and they won't stop talking.

I took a selfie and my face looked like it was melting.

When your lady body is like, 'Yeah, I'll take the extra 20 pounds and a face like a fried egg.'

I can't see my feet anymore. They're in a different state.

I tried to do a plank and it looked like a crime scene.

I took a mirror selfie and it looked like a horror movie.

That magical time when your body forgets how to be cute and just goes full 'I'm a middle-aged woman who still thinks she's 21.'

I tried to do a cartwheel and it looked like a wrestling match.

I wore my old jeans and they now call me 'the legend.'

I tried to do a split and my body said, 'Nope, not today.'

When your lady body is like, 'Sure, I'll take the extra 20 pounds, and I'll also take the face of a tired raccoon.'

I tried to do a yoga pose and it looked like a crime scene.

I took a selfie and my face looked like it was cooked.

My pants are now a second job and my body is a third.