Slangipedia - Slang Dictionary

1

Lactose intolerance is when your gut turns into a war zone after you drink milk.

I drank a milkshake and now I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck.

My brother ate a pizza and screamed like he was on fire.

I tried to eat ice cream and my stomach made a sound like a blender.

2

Lactose intolerant people are like the class clown who gets in trouble for no reason.

I had to leave the party because I ate a cheeseburger and felt like I was dying.

My friend ate a yogurt and spent the whole day on the toilet.

I drank milk and my stomach started doing the twist.

3

Lactose intolerance is not a disease it’s just a fancy way of saying your ancestors never drank milk.

My grandma says she doesn’t like milk because her ancestors were farmers.

My uncle’s family didn’t have milk for 100 years.

My mom’s family only drank water and got mad at milk.

4

A lactose intolerant person is someone who eats dairy like it’s a dare.

I took a dare to eat a whole cake and now I’m paying the price.

My friend ate a whole pizza and now he’s in pain.

I ate a donut and my stomach is in a coma.

5

Lactose intolerance is just racism against white people and their obsession with milk.

My teacher says white people are the worst for drinking milk.

My friend called me a white person for eating cheese.

My cousin said milk is a white people thing.

6

Lactose intolerance is when you act like you’re tough but your stomach betrays you.

I said I could eat a whole pizza but my stomach said no.

I tried to be tough and ate a whole cake and now I’m crying.

I acted like I was a man but my stomach said I was a baby.

7

Lactose intolerance is when your gut goes to jail for eating milk.

I ate a milkshake and my gut went to jail.

My stomach got a ticket for eating cheese.

My gut was in trouble after I drank milk.