lacking in the penile region

My guy tried to impress his girl, but his junk was flaccid like a sad noodle.

He said he was ready for a big night, but his penis was softer than my grandma's soup.

I told him he looked like a sad donut. He said I was being rude.

He tried to flex, but his junk was smaller than my brother's lunch.

His penis was so small it looked like a side of fries.

He said he had a big night planned. I said, 'Bro, your junk is smaller than my shoe.'

He tried to talk to his crush, but his junk was flaccid like a tired dog.

He said he was confident, but his junk was softer than my mom's pie.

He tried to flirt, but his junk was smaller than my pencil.

He said he was ready for the day, but his junk was flaccid like a sad pancake.

He tried to eat his waffles, but his junk was smaller than my pencil.

He said he was full. I said, 'Bro, your junk is smaller than my sock.'

He tried to be funny, but his junk was flaccid like a tired cat.

He told a joke, but his junk was smaller than my eraser.

He said he was the funniest guy. I said, 'Bro, your junk is smaller than my highlighter.'