labor pains

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when you're stuck in a toilet, screaming like a baby, and your pants are soaked

I was stuck in the toilet for an hour and my pants were soaked. I looked like a soggy taco.

She was screaming so loud I thought the neighbors called the cops.

I tried to text my mom but my hands were too shaky.

when your butt feels like it's on fire and you're begging for mercy

My butt felt like it was on fire and I was begging my friend for mercy.

He was so sore he cried like a toddler.

I asked my dad for a hug and he said 'No, I'm not your mother.'

when you're on the floor, covered in sweat, and your brain is melting

I was on the floor, sweating like a pig, and my brain felt like it was melting.

She looked like a hot mess after her first labor pain.

He was so hot he could've cooked a pizza.