L Ron Gardner

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2 views · Added 9d ago · 3 definitions

1
A pile of poop so runny it looks like it was melted by a nuclear bomb and then stepped on by a giant.
My breakfast was a mystery meat sandwich and a side of liquid disgrace.
I had to use two toilets at once just to keep the floor from collapsing.
My dog looked at me like I had betrayed him.
2
Stool so soft it could be used as a pillow for a crying baby, but also smells like a dead raccoon in a trash can.
I ate pizza and now my butt is crying.
I sat on the toilet and it felt like I was in a warzone.
My roommate ran out of the room screaming like he saw a ghost.
3
A bowel movement so messy it looks like a toddler threw a bowl of soup and a bag of chips at a wall.
I looked at my toilet paper and it was covered in what looked like war paint.
I had to clean the toilet with a mop and a curse word.
My cat stared at me like I had lost my mind.
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