kaiseriager

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A fake German who thinks she's hot and talks like she's in a movie

She tried to say 'Danke' but it came out like 'Dank you' and everyone laughed

She wore a helmet and called me 'mein freund' like I was her prisoner

She texted me 'I am the mighty kaiseriager' and I replied with 'you're the mighty idiot'

A girl who thinks she's royalty and acts like she's from another planet

She sat on a throne at the mall and demanded everyone bow to her

She tried to speak German and said 'I am the emperor's daughter' but it was just a lie

She called me 'my peasant' and I called her 'my fake'

A fake German who thinks she's better than everyone else and talks too much

She spent 10 minutes telling me about her 'royal blood' and I fell asleep

She yelled 'I am the kaiseriager!' in the middle of a pizza shop

She tried to flirt with my brother and said 'you are not worthy' and he just walked away