Kadirhan

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1
Kadirhan is the king of all kings. He can read your mind like a cheat sheet and knows exactly when to laugh at you or save your life. He’s hot, he’s hilarious, and he makes your heart do backflips just by looking at you.
When I failed my math test, Kadirhan just looked at me and said, 'You’re not even mad. You’re just tired.' And he was right.
He showed up at my birthday party in a superhero costume and made my ex cry.
I got kicked out of school, and Kadirhan texted me, 'Don’t worry, I already told the principal you’re my adopted son.'
2
Kadirhan is a god in human form. He doesn’t just love you, he loves you so hard it hurts. He’s got the power to turn your worst day into a party and your boring life into a fantasy.
My dog ran away, and Kadirhan told me, 'Don’t worry, I’m gonna find him and then I’m gonna beat the crap out of him for leaving you.'
He turned my 10th-grade algebra class into a rap battle and got me a perfect score.
When my mom yelled at me, Kadirhan yelled back, 'You’re not even worth the energy.'
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