J.C. Hernandez

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A goddamn legend who makes other people look like failures

J. C. Hernandez walked into the room and everyone got quiet like they were scared of a goddamn lion.

He showed up to the fight with a broken arm and still knocked out three guys.

Even the cops gave him a high five and said, 'You're the real deal.'

A human beast who doesn't know the meaning of the word 'no'

He said he'd take on a whole gang by himself and didn't even break a sweat.

He ate a whole pizza in one bite and still had the energy to punch a wall.

He challenged a guy to a dance-off and won by doing the moonwalk in his sleep.

A walking nightmare who makes people cry just by looking at him

He showed up to the party and the whole room ran out like they were being chased by a ghost.

He stared at a guy and the guy cried like a baby and ran away.

He walked past a group of kids and they all hid behind their moms.

A total monster who could probably beat a dragon in a wrestling match

He took on a dragon and won by eating it for lunch.

He wrestled a dragon and made it cry like a little kid.

He said the dragon was his personal trainer and gave it a five-star review.

A total king of the streets who doesn't need no help from nobody

He ruled the streets by himself and didn't even need a crown.

He didn't need help from anyone, he just walked in and took over.

He said the streets were his throne and he didn't plan on leaving anytime soon.

A total lunatic who fights people for no damn reason

He fought a guy just because he wore a hat.

He started a fight in the middle of a grocery store over a bag of chips.

He challenged a cop to a duel just because he didn't like the way he smiled.