jacob moon

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A guy who’s head over heels for a kid and would sell his soul to get her to take his pants off

I’d do anything to get her to text me back. Even if it means getting a tattoo of her face.

I’d eat a whole pizza for her. And I hate pizza.

If she asked me to wear a chicken suit to school, I’d do it without question.

A guy who thinks a kid is the best thing since sliced bread and would let her step on his face if it got her to say yes

I’d let her walk all over me. Even if it meant getting kicked in the shins.

If she wanted me to wear a unicorn costume to the mall, I’d do it.

I’d let her text me while I was in the bathroom. Even if it took 20 minutes.

A guy who’s in love with a kid and would do anything, even if it meant getting a lice infestation just to be close to her

I’d let her borrow my hoodie even if it had lice in it.

I’d help her cheat on a test. Even if it meant getting caught.

I’d sit in the back of the bus just to be near her. Even if it smelled like old socks.