Jacob Matthews

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#hot#crush#texting fail

3 views · Added 10d ago · 12 definitions

1
A hot guy who makes your heart go boom like a firecracker in a pantsuit
Jacob walked in and I literally dropped my phone. Like, it was a full-on faceplant.
He’s the reason my crush list now has 12 names instead of 1.
I tried to text him and my thumbs were too shaky. I sent 'hi' 5 times.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
2
A guy so good he could make a statue of himself and it’d still be cool
He solved the math problem in 2 seconds. I still don’t know what it was.
He got a 100% on the test. I got a 50% and I didn’t even cheat.
He’s like a superhero but with better fashion sense.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
3
A guy who makes jokes so good they should get their own show and a raise
He told a joke so funny I laughed so hard I snorted my juice.
His jokes are better than my mom’s cooking. And that’s saying something.
He made the whole class laugh until the teacher gave up and joined in.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
4
A guy who’s like a mystery novel but with more drama and less homework
He’s got more secrets than my little sister’s diary.
He told me he’s been to space. I believe him because he’s that cool.
He acts like he’s been through a war. But he just failed math.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
5
A guy who’s like a video game but with more swearing and fewer obstacles
He beats every level in the game like it’s his full-time job.
He once beat the boss in 3 seconds. I still don’t know how.
He’s got more lives than my phone battery.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
6
A guy who’s like a unicorn but with more sweat and fewer glitter
He’s like a unicorn but he’s got a sweat stain on his shirt. And it’s glorious.
He’s got the magic of unicorns but he’s also got a 90% in math. That’s rare.
He’s like a unicorn but he doesn’t glitter. He just shines.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
7
A guy who gets so mad he could punch a wall and it would cry
He got so mad he punched the wall and it fell down. Like, literally.
He got mad at me for eating his sandwich. I felt bad for the wall.
He got so mad he screamed so loud the principal came running.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
8
A guy who falls for people so fast he could win a race against a pigeon
He fell for me in 3 seconds. I still haven’t fallen for him yet.
He fell for his crush so fast he didn’t even notice the test was on fire.
He fell for me so fast I didn’t even have time to say hi.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
9
A guy who gets hurt so much he could be a part-time crybaby
He fell off his bike and cried like a baby. And that’s saying something.
He got a paper cut and cried. I got a paper cut and I just stared at it.
He got hurt so much he’s got a permanent frown.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
10
A guy who’s got a heart so sweet it could make a cookie cry
He gave me a cookie and it cried. I don’t know why.
He’s got a heart so sweet it’s like eating a whole bag of candy.
He’s so sweet he even lets me eat his sandwich.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
11
A guy who’s so loveable he could make a dog jealous
He’s so loveable my dog tried to hug him. And failed.
He’s got that magic that makes people fall in love with him. Even my dog.
He’s so loveable I’m starting to think he’s a love wizard.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
12
A guy who’s so happy he could make a rainbow jealous
He’s so happy I think he’s got a rainbow inside him.
He’s got that smile that could make a rainbow jealous.
He’s so happy he’s like a walking rainbow.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
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