Jacky Tar

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A sailor who’s so dumb he thinks the sea is just a big puddle and the sky is just a ceiling someone forgot to paint.

'I sailed the ocean blue, but I still think it’s just a big puddle.'

'The sky? That’s just a ceiling someone forgot to paint.'

'I tried to be a sailor, but I just ended up being a puddle.'

A mix of French and English who speak like they’re drunk on coffee and confused about their heritage.

'I say 'café' but I mean 'coffee' and I don’t know why.'

'My accent is like a bad remix of French and English.'

'I can’t speak French, but I’ll still say I’m French if it gets me a free baguette.'