jackthon dundun

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a kid who's got binoculars on your back and takes notes about your life

He’s been following me since lunch. I think he’s got a report on me by now.

I saw him peeking through my math test. He’s got a spy sheet for the teacher.

He’s been whispering to his best friend during every class. I know they’re plotting.

the kid who thinks he's your dad and knows all your secrets

He knows my lunch order and my crush’s name. He’s not even my dad.

He told my mom I left my homework at his house. I didn’t even do my homework.

He acts like he’s been watching me since birth. I’ve only known him since last week.

the kid who thinks he's your best friend but he's just a stalker

He shows up at my house every day. He’s not even my best friend.

He texts me at 2 a. m. with random questions. He’s not even my best friend.

He’s been sitting behind me for weeks. He’s not even my best friend.

a kid who follows you like a lost puppy and won't stop talking

He won’t stop talking about his pet turtle. I’ve only seen it once.

He followed me to the cafeteria. He’s been there since 8 a. m.

He’s been talking nonstop for ten minutes. I don’t even know what he’s talking about.

the kid who's like a detective and thinks he's got you figured out

He thinks he knows why I failed math. He doesn’t even know what math is.

He’s been watching me like I’m on a reality show. I didn’t even sign up.

He’s got a whole list of my mistakes. He’s not even my friend.

the kid who’s like a shadow and won’t leave you alone

He’s been behind me for three hours. I can’t even breathe in peace.

He’s like a ghost. He shows up everywhere I go.

He’s been following me to the bathroom. What’s next? The nurse’s office?