jacktardian

Fresh

0 views · Added 1d ago · 5 definitions

Acting like a donkey who also got hit in the head with a hammer.

My cousin thinks he's the king of the world because he knows how to flip a burger.

She texted me at 2 a. m. just to say her dog pooped on the couch.

He tried to explain the theory of relativity to a kid who was still wearing pajamas.

Being so dumb it makes a goldfish look like a genius.

He asked if the sky was blue because he thought the sun was a lightbulb.

She believed the moon was made of cheese and that aliens were just a conspiracy.

He tried to eat a whole pizza in one bite and then cried like a baby.

A human who thinks they're the smartest person in the room, but they're not.

He told the teacher he invented gravity and got sent to the principal's office.

She said she could beat anyone in a spelling bee, even though she spelled 'cat' as 'c a t.'

He tried to explain why the sky was purple and failed miserably.

A person who thinks they're the boss of everything, even though they're not.

He told the police he was the president and they gave him a ticket.

She tried to take over the school lunch line and ended up fighting the cafeteria lady.

He told the dog he was the king and the dog just looked at him like he was crazy.

Someone who talks so much it makes a parrot look like it's been quiet for years.

He talked the whole time and no one could even hear the teacher.

She kept talking about her cat and her brother and her job and her ex.

He texted me 20 messages just to say good morning.