Jacksonville, FL

My cousin lives in Jacksonville. He's like a turd in a toilet bowl, but with a mullet.

I tried to visit Jacksonville. The smell was worse than my uncle’s sock drawer.

Jacksonville is the only place where the turds have their own city council.

My friend moved to Jacksonville. Now he hates everyone, and he drinks at 10 a. m.

They have a cop who looks like he just woke up from a century in a coffin.

Jacksonville is like a reality show where everyone is a loser.

The cops in Jacksonville don't care if you're innocent. They just want you in jail.

My neighbor got arrested for wearing a hat. The cop said it was a ‘racial issue.’

Jacksonville is so racist, even the KKK has a vacation home there.

Every girl in Jacksonville thinks she's a supermodel. Even the ones who work at the mall.

I saw a guy at the park who had a mullet and a gut. He looked like a walking hot dog.

Jacksonville girls have more kids than a barista at a Starbucks.

My cousin went to jail for stealing a sandwich. He said it was the best vacation ever.

Jacksonville is like a jail with a city council. They get paid to hate people.

If you live in Jacksonville, you'll end up in jail. It's just a matter of time.

Jacksonville smells like my uncle’s garage after he drinks all day.

The library in Jacksonville is empty because everyone else is at the bar.

I tried to read in the Jacksonville library, but the smell made me pass out.

The cops in Jacksonville are all related to the KKK. They have a family tree that’s more complicated than yours.

Jacksonville’s city government is run by a cult. They wear mullets and drink beer.

You don’t get promoted in Jacksonville unless you’re in the KKK.

Jacksonville is so bad, even a hurricane would say, ‘Thank you, I needed this.’

If a hurricane hit Jacksonville, it would be like a welcome party.

The only thing that would improve Jacksonville is a Category 5 hurricane.