jackson sweeney

He posted a before and after photo. The before was him. The after was a pizza.

He told me he lost ten pounds. I asked him if he counted the cheese.

He tried to do a plank. His ass fell off.

He posted a video of himself doing a push-up. It looked like a cough.

He told me he lost weight. I asked if he lost it or just moved it.

He tried to run. His legs gave up. His ass stayed.

He looked in the mirror. It screamed at him. He ignored it.

He told me he lost weight. I asked if the mirror was on strike.

He did a squat. The floor groaned.