jackobate

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When a guy spends more time jerking off than actually living his life. It’s like he’s got a tiny brain and a huge ego.

Bro, you jackobate more than you eat.

I saw him doing it in the bathroom during lunch.

He claims he’s a pro, but he’s still stuck on level one.

A guy who shoved a can so big up his butt, his mom called the police. But I still like him because he’s got some kind of magic.

That guy ate a whole pizza and then jackobated like it was a marathon.

He jackobated in the middle of the street and didn’t even care.

He tried to jackobate with a soda can and it exploded.

A man so handsome, he could make a pig jealous. He’s like the king of the jungle, and everyone else is just background noise.

He walked in and I immediately lost my cool.

He’s got that look, like he’s got a secret.

He made my crush feel like a nobody.