jackathon

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When a guy jacks off so much he could be in the NBA, and he’s not even playing basketball.

My mom thinks I’m studying, but I’m just jacking off in my room with the lights off.

I jacked off six times today and I still have energy for video games.

I told my friend I was going to the gym, but I was actually just jacking off in my pants.

A guy sitting in his underwear watching porn like it’s the Super Bowl and he’s going to get paid for it.

I watched 20 minutes of porn and I’m already hard again.

I sat on the couch all day and jacked off to a model who looked like my ex.

I didn’t even take my shirt off, I just jacked off to a video.

When a guy jacks off so much his smart watch thinks he’s running a marathon, but he’s just lying on his bed.

My watch said I ran a marathon, but I was just jacking off to a video.

I got a medal for running a marathon, but I didn’t even leave my room.

I told my mom I ran a marathon, but I just jacked off for 2 hours.

When a guy jacks off so much he can’t even get hard anymore, and he’s just sad about it.

I jacked off so much my dick went to sleep.

I tried to jack off again, but I couldn’t even get hard.

I tried to jack off and I just felt like a sad turtle.