Jack Speed

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#hot mess#dumb god#shy giant

2 views · Added 10d ago · 3 definitions

1
A meathead who looks like a Greek god but is still too dumb to realize girls like him. He’s got a body like a superhero but acts like he’s never had a date. He’s a walking disaster who thinks he’s cool, but he’s just a hot mess.
My cousin is a Jack Speed. He’s got a six-pack and still says he’s never had a girlfriend.
He looks like a model but still says he’s too shy to talk to girls.
He’s got a body like a statue but still acts like he’s never been kissed.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
2
Trying to jack-off so fast it sounds like a chainsaw running at a concert. It’s like trying to finish a whole pizza in one bite and then screaming about it.
He tried to jack-off so fast, it sounded like a cat was running on a treadmill.
He was jacking-off like he was trying to break a speed record and failed.
He tried to jack-off so fast, it made the neighbor’s dog howl.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
3
You’re running late, but you still can’t help but rub one out. It’s like you’re in a hurry, but your brain is still doing its own thing.
I was running late to work, but I still took five minutes to jack-off.
She was late for her date but still had time to jack-off in the bathroom.
He was running late for his mom’s funeral but still jacked-off on the way.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
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