Jack Jansen

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A boring, lifeless meat sack who thinks he’s cool. He’s gonna beat you at Mini-Hoop and laugh in your face.

Jack Jansen just showed me his Mini-Hoop skills. I was literally sweating in the shade.

He beat me at Mini-Hoop and said I was a ‘disappointment’.

Jack Jansen is the only person who can make Mini-Hoop sound like a curse.

A human version of a slow elevator. He plays Mini-Hoop like it’s a sacred ritual and you’re a sacrificial lamb.

Jack Jansen played Mini-Hoop for 20 minutes. I left before it was over.

He turned Mini-Hoop into a religious event. I got excommunicated.

Jack Jansen played Mini-Hoop so long I almost got a new hobby.

A guy who thinks he’s the king of Mini-Hoop. He’s not. He’s more like the royal pain in the ass.

Jack Jansen claimed he was the king of Mini-Hoop. I told him he was the royal pain.

He bragged about his Mini-Hoop skills. I asked him if he had a death wish.

Jack Jansen thinks he’s the king. I think he’s just a really bad jester.