jack in the box shit

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1
That huge pile of crap you held in all day like a madman and then the second you plop on the couch you let it rip like a dragon and the bowl is soaked and full like a swimming pool.
I came home and my dog looked at me like I had just committed a crime.
My sister was in the kitchen and she heard everything and laughed like a hyena.
I had to take a shower and my pants were soaked from the mess.
2
Getting hit so hard on the head and face you feel like you were in a car crash and the other person was drunk and had a bat.
My cousin got jacked up and he looked like a melon that got dropped from a ladder.
My brother was screaming like a baby and he had a nosebleed.
He was so dizzy he tried to punch the wall and missed by inches.
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