Jack Floyd

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A lazy ass who runs away from trouble like it’s hot chicken and he’s got a burn on his tongue.

Jack Floyd ghosted my group chat 10 minutes before the test.

He skipped the meeting because he was too busy licking the boss’s shoe.

He didn’t show up to the party because he was eating breakfast and didn’t want to leave his waffle.

A backstabbing bastard who leaves you hanging like a bad punchline.

He said he’d help me move, then texted me ‘I’m busy eating my feelings’ and left me with a couch.

He promised to show up to the fight, then said he had to go eat a sandwich with his dad.

He left me high and dry because he was too busy getting his face kissed by the principal.

A weakling who backs out of anything because he’s too busy licking someone’s boots.

He said he’d help me cheat on the test, then ran off to eat lunch with the teacher.

He bailed on the prank because he was too busy eating a muffin and pretending he was important.

He didn’t show up to the prank because he was too busy being a pet to the principal.