Jack and Black

My gym teacher is Jack and Black. He stares at me like I owe him money.

My uncle says he’s the only man who could make a fat suit look good.

I think my dog is Jack and Black. He eats my homework and my socks.

My brother says Tenacious D is the best band since the invention of pizza.

I think Jack and Black is the reason my math teacher has a rock band.

My mom told me I should be in a band like Tenacious D. I said, 'No thanks, I prefer being a failure.'

My cousin does 'Jack Blacking it' in the shower every morning. It’s like a horror movie.

My dog does it when he wants more treats. He yells 'brig digga dig' and I give him a whole bag of chips.

My teacher does it when she’s mad at the class. The whole school hears it.

Jack and Black is my favorite actor. He’s like a superhero with a laugh.

He’s the only guy who can make me cry during a movie and then laugh at my own tears.

I think he’s the reason I failed my math test. He distracted me too much.

Jack and Black is my hero. He makes me want to be cool and also eat a whole pizza.

My hero is Jack and Black. He’s like a god with a voice and a guitar.

He’s my hero, your hero, and the reason I passed my math test.

I tried 'Jack and Black' once. I jizzed so hard I fell into my soup.

My brother does it every weekend. He jizzes and then sleeps for three days.

I think my dog does it when he eats my homework. He jizzes and then barks at me.

Jack and Black is the sexiest man I’ve ever seen. He looks like a pizza with a voice.

He’s the sexiest man alive. He’s like a superhero and a chunky man.

He’s my favorite celeb. He’s like a pizza, a rockstar, and a boss.