Jacindaphile

I’d follow Jacinda Ardern anywhere, even if it means getting stuck in a traffic jam with 10,000 other Jacindaphiles.

My dog hates me now because I cried when Jacinda Ardern gave a speech about bees.

I would marry Jacinda Ardern if she asked me, even though I don’t know how to tie a tie.

I told my mom I was a Jacindaphile, and she said I was wasting my life on a prime minister who might never even text me back.

My teacher gave me a detention for drawing Jacinda Ardern on the board instead of doing math.

I bought a Jacinda Ardern T-shirt, and now I wear it every day, even when it smells like old toast.

I got in a fight with my brother because he said Jacinda Ardern was overrated, and I said she was perfect, even if she sometimes eats cereal for dinner.

I named my goldfish after Jacinda Ardern, and now it stares at me like I betrayed it.

I once asked Jacinda Ardern for a selfie, and she said yes, even though I looked like I’d been run over by a bus.