Jabin

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4 views · Added 10d ago · 7 definitions

1
Blindingly bright like a flash of piss in the dark
My mom's face when she saw my report card
The sun when it's trying to kill you
My cousin's hair after he used a hair dryer as a flamethrower
2
A king who can tell your mom's secrets from 10 feet away and still manage to be a total dork
He knew my dad was cheating on my mom before I did
He called my aunt a 'walking meatball' in front of her
He once fought a chicken in the mall parking lot
3
A girl so pretty she could make your teeth hurt, but she's also a total idiot and thinks she's the boss of everyone
She told my brother he was 'ugly and dumb' in front of 200 people
She tried to cook and set the kitchen on fire
She claims she can talk to cats, but they just laugh at her
4
The cutest boy ever, but he's also a total mess and talks like he's being chased by a dragon
He ran into a wall screaming 'I'm gonna be the best!'
He told his best friend he was 'the king of the universe' in 2 seconds
He once spilled a whole soda on his best friend and laughed about it
5
A Bible king who loved his pets and wife, but he had no idea what he was doing and would fight anyone who looked at him wrong
He fought a guy over a chicken
He yelled at the moon for not being cool enough
He told his wife he was 'the best king in the world' and then cried
6
A man who loves cold beer, lifting weights, and his pets, but he's also a total idiot who thinks he's a superhero
He tried to bench press a cow
He told his dog he was 'the king of the park'
He once said he could beat Superman with just a beer and a squat
7
A dog so special they should give him a medal and a raise, but he's also a total mess and acts like he's the boss of the whole world
He pooped on the carpet and laughed at me
He ran into the wall and didn't stop
He tried to eat my homework and failed
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