i'll be a monkey's uncle

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This phrase is used when you're so shocked you might as well be related to a smelly monkey in a trash can.

'You failed math again? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'

'He just proposed to his boss? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'

'You ate my entire pizza? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'

You say this when you're so surprised you swear you can smell a monkey's butt from ten miles away.

'You just got a perfect score on the test? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'

'He ate the last donut? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'

'You broke my phone? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'

This is what you yell when you're so stunned you'd rather be stuck with a monkey than your annoying cousin.

'You just passed the class? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'

'You stole my lunch? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'

'You just texted me during class? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'

You say this when you're so amazed you wish you had a monkey for a pet instead of a bad grade.

'You finished the whole homework? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'

'He just got a scholarship? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'

'You just texted me during the test? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'

This phrase comes out when you're so surprised you'd rather be stuck with a monkey than your worst enemy.

'You just got a 100 on the quiz? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'

'He just said no to the pizza? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'

'You just told the teacher about my doodles? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'

You use this when you're so surprised you swear you could punch a monkey and win.

'You just passed the test? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'

'He just ate my entire sandwich? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'

'You just told the teacher about my bad behavior? I'll be a monkey's uncle!'