I write sins not tragedies

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The only song that ever made a church full of old people yell 'slut' in unison like they were all in a choir of shame.

My grandma yelled 'slut' so loud she scared the pastor.

The entire congregation was screaming 'slut' like they'd been waiting their whole lives for this.

I saw a priest throw holy water at the stage during this song.

The only song that ever got a group of men in suits to yell 'bitch' like they were all in a business meeting gone wrong.

My dad yelled 'bitch' so hard he broke his coffee cup.

The boardroom turned into a yelling match of 'bitch' for ten minutes straight.

I think the CEO actually cried during this song.

The only song that ever made a group of teenagers throw their phones at the stage like it was a slasher movie.

My cousin threw her phone so hard it hit the singer in the face.

The whole crowd was screaming 'whore' and throwing phones like they were in a fight.

I saw a kid throw his phone so far it almost hit the ceiling.

The only song that ever made a group of people in a nursing home yell 'f***' so loud the nurses had to give them all sedatives.

The nursing home turned into a yelling match of 'f***' like it was a battle of the elders.

I saw one lady yell 'f***' so loud she knocked over a whole cart of pills.

The nurses had to sedate three people after this song.

The only song that ever made a group of people in a jail yell 'slut' like they were all getting ready to fight.

The whole jail was screaming 'slut' like it was a prison riot.

I saw one guy yell 'slut' so hard he broke his cell door.

The guards had to put everyone in timeout after this song.

The only song that ever made a group of people in a gym yell 'b***h' like they were all doing a workout of rage.

The gym turned into a yelling match of 'b***h' like it was a fitness battle.

I saw one guy yell 'b***h' so hard he lifted a dumbbell with his voice.

The treadmill guy was yelling 'b***h' so loud he broke the treadmill.