I Was Lost

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What you tell the cops when your kid's tiny attention span drags you into the middle of the woods like a damn idiot.

'I was lost' because my kid ran off with a squirrel and I followed like a dog.

'I was lost' because I got lost chasing my kid's imaginary friend.

'I was lost' because I was lost in the woods because I was lost in my own head.

What you say when you remember the game and start a full-blown meltdown, taking out everyone near you like a raging lunatic.

'I was lost' because I lost and I was mad and I took out my whole squad.

'I was lost' because I lost and I started screaming at my brother.

'I was lost' because I lost and I threw my controller like it owed me money.

When you spend all day watching LOST and then realize you still don't get it and are slightly confused.

'I was lost' because I watched LOST and I still don't know what happened.

'I was lost' because I watched LOST and I got a headache.

'I was lost' because I watched LOST and I now hate time travel.

What you yell when you lose The Game and you're too mad to think straight.

'I was lost' because I lost The Game and I was too mad to breathe.

'I was lost' because I lost The Game and I started crying.

'I was lost' because I lost The Game and I threw my shoes.

What you say when you both lost and you're too tired to care anymore.

'I was lost' because we both lost and we both gave up.

'I was lost' because I lost and my friend lost and we just sat there.

'I was lost' because we both lost and we both just said 'meh'.

What you tell your mom when you lost your pants and your dignity in one go.

'I was lost' because I lost my pants and my mom saw it.

'I was lost' because I lost my pants and I was embarrassed.

'I was lost' because I lost my pants and my brother laughed.

When you say it so many times that your brain explodes and you just stop talking.

'I was lost' because I said it 100 times and my brain gave up.

'I was lost' because I said it until I forgot what it meant.

'I was lost' because I said it so much my mouth fell off.