I love the pandemic

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When you’re getting absolutely destroyed and you’re screaming like a baby who just got told they’re adopted

I love the pandemic because I was getting wrecked and I was crying like a kid who got kicked out of their family.

I love the pandemic because I was getting trampled and I was begging like a dog who got hit with a bat.

I love the pandemic because I was getting crushed and I was yelling like a kid who got told they’re not allowed to eat cake anymore.

When you’re getting hit so hard you think your brain is going to pop out your ears

I love the pandemic because I got hit so hard I thought my brain was going to come out my nose.

I love the pandemic because I got hit so much I thought my brain was going to explode like a piñata.

I love the pandemic because I got hit so bad I thought my brain was going to run away.

When you’re getting absolutely obliterated and you’re begging like you’re in a death match with a dragon

I love the pandemic because I was getting totally destroyed and I was begging like a knight who just saw a dragon.

I love the pandemic because I was getting smashed and I was screaming like a warrior who lost his sword.

I love the pandemic because I was getting wrecked and I was crying like a kid who lost his last cookie.