I found a shell

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A stupid way to say you didn’t notice someone peeing in the ocean. Everyone knows you’re too busy staring at your own feet to care.

I found a shell and still didn’t see you throw up in the waves.

I found a shell while you were yelling at a seagull.

I found a shell and you were too busy sniffing your own toes.

A lazy excuse for not paying attention. Like saying you’re busy when you’re clearly just being an idiot.

I found a shell and you were still talking about your ex’s dog.

I found a shell and you were arguing with a crab.

I found a shell and you were trying to flirt with a jellyfish.

A dumb phrase used by people who think they’re cool but are just being annoying.

I found a shell and you were still taking selfies.

I found a shell and you were arguing with the tide.

I found a shell and you were still yelling at the sky.

A ridiculous way to say you didn’t notice anything. Like a kid who thinks they’re the best surfer ever but can’t even catch a wave.

I found a shell and you were still eating your sandwich.

I found a shell and you were still talking about your dog’s bad day.

I found a shell and you were still arguing with your mom.

A stupid way to act like you’re paying attention when you’re clearly not. Used by people who think they’re smart but are just being loud.

I found a shell and you were still talking about your pizza.

I found a shell and you were still arguing with the sun.

I found a shell and you were still singing in the shower.

A dumb phrase that people use when they’re too lazy to think. Like a kid who can’t even ride a bike but still thinks they’re the best.

I found a shell and you were still talking about your video game.

I found a shell and you were still eating your lunch.

I found a shell and you were still arguing with your dad.