I envy you

My friend said, 'I envy you,' after I bought a new phone and he still uses his broken one.

My cousin said, 'I envy you,' when I got a promotion and he's still stuck in the same job.

My mom said, 'I envy you,' after I skipped her birthday and got a raise.

My coworker said, 'I envy you,' when I got a better office and he still sits by the printer.

My neighbor said, 'I envy you,' after I moved out and he's still stuck in his messy house.

My brother said, 'I envy you,' when I got a new car and he still drives his 2005 Toyota.

My ex said, 'I envy you,' when I got married and she's still single and sad.

My classmate said, 'I envy you,' after I got straight A's and he failed math again.

My dad said, 'I envy you,' after I got a new job and he's still working at the gas station.