i don't mind

My ex just screamed at me because I forgot her birthday again.

She threw my phone out the window because I texted her a meme instead of a gift.

She’s sitting on the couch eating pizza and yelling at me through the door.

She said she’s going to get a cat and let it eat your soul.

She’s making a list of everything you’ve ever done wrong.

She’s threatening to dye your hair pink if you don’t fix your attitude.

She’s planning to break up with you and take all your friends with her.

She said she’s going to text your mom about your bad habits.

She’s wearing her most dramatic outfit just to show you how mad she is.