I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

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A lazy way to say you're too dumb to figure it out and don't want to try.

Why didn't you show up to the party? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

How did you fail math? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

Why is your dog eating your homework? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

A coward's excuse for not knowing something and not wanting to admit it.

Why did you leave your job? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

How did you miss the test? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

Why are you still single? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

A magical phrase that makes people think you're clever when you're actually a mess.

Why is your car broken? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

How did you burn your toast? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

Why did you forget your birthday? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

A fancy way to say you're not smart enough and don't want to be called out on it.

Why did you get fired? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

How did you lose your keys? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

Why did you eat the whole cake? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

A loud excuse used when you're too lazy to think and too proud to say you're confused.

Why are you still wearing pajamas? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

How did you miss the bus? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

Why did you text me at 3 a. m.? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

A magical spell you cast when you're too tired to remember your own life.

Why did you forget your mom's birthday? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

How did you lose your phone? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.

Why did you sleep through your alarm? I don't know, I'm not a wizard.