i am way to sober for this shit right now

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This person is so clear-headed they can see through the nonsense and it’s making them furious.

I am way too sober for this stupid argument right now.

I can see every single flaw in your plan and I’m not even mad, I’m just tired.

This nonsense is giving me a headache and I haven’t even had coffee yet.

They’re so sober they could probably drink the whole thing and still be fine.

I’m way too sober for this party right now. I could drink the whole bar and still be okay.

This is like watching paint dry and I’m not even drunk yet.

I could handle this if I was drunk, but I’m not.

This person is so clean in their head they’re probably judging you for being messy.

I am way too sober for this mess right now. I could’ve been sleeping.

This is like being in a fight with a baby and I’m not even drunk.

I can see every single mistake you made and I’m still mad.

They’re so sober they’re probably thinking about taxes and it’s making them lose their mind.

I’m way too sober for this nonsense. I could be counting my money instead.

This is like being in a math class and I didn’t even have coffee yet.

I can’t even handle this because I’m thinking about taxes.

This person is so sober they’re like a robot and it’s giving them a headache.

I’m way too sober for this conversation right now. I could be sleeping.

This is like being in a robot fight and I didn’t even have coffee.

I can see through everything and it’s making me angry.

They’re so sober they could probably run a marathon and still be fine.

I’m way too sober for this stupid party right now. I could run a marathon and still be okay.

This is like watching grass grow and I’m not even drunk.

I could handle this if I was drunk, but I’m not.