h*rny

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when you’re so desperate for love that you’ll cuddle a raccoon just to feel something other than loneliness.

i would date a ghost if it gave me a hug

my ex is a raccoon and i’m still in love with it

i asked my dog to propose to me and it just sneezed

when someone is so wild they should be locked in a cage and fed only pizza and chaos.

she texted me a video of her dancing in a chicken suit at 3 am

he tried to propose to his cat and now the cat has a ring on its paw

they brought a goat to the prom and now everyone’s in trouble