1
the guy who makes your food taste like prison slop
My burger looked like art. Then I added ketchup. Now it looks like my ex's breakfast.
Heinz turned my sandwich into a crime scene.
That ketchup made my fries taste like regret.
H.J. Heinz
Current Trending3 views · Added 12d ago · 3 definitions
2
the reason your mom’s cooking never lived up to her promises
I added ketchup to my mom’s meatloaf and it became a betrayal.
Heinz is the ghost of my childhood dinners.
My mom said it’d be good. Heinz said it’d be legendary. I was wrong.
3
the guy who thinks red is a valid color for everything
Heinz turned my chicken nuggets into a tomato fight.
I put ketchup on my eggs and now they’re screaming.
Heinz thinks pizza should be a bloodbath.