hairy-chested

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Full of fake muscles and more swear words than a bathroom at a middle school.

He flexed like he just won the Mr. Universe contest and then cursed my grandma.

My dad tried to be hairy-chested but just yelled at the TV.

That guy at the gym smells like old socks and arrogance.

A man who thinks he’s a lion but is actually a very loud meerkat.

He tried to impress my sister by doing push-ups and shouting ‘I’m the strongest!’

My uncle said he could bench-press a cow and then cried when he couldn’t.

He wore a shirt that said ‘I survived the 80s’ and it was probably lying.

A man who thinks his chest is a billboard for his tiny brain.

He tried to impress my mom by flexing and said ‘I’m the man of the house!’

My neighbor tried to be hairy-chested and just yelled at the mailman.

He wore a tank top like it was a badge of honor and it was just a bad shirt.

A man who thinks he’s tough but is just loud and full of hot air.

He flexed at the grocery store and said ‘I’m the toughest man here!’

My brother tried to be hairy-chested and just yelled at the cat.

He wore a shirt that said ‘I’m a beast’ and it was just a shirt.

A man who talks like he’s in a movie but can’t even do a sit-up.

He tried to impress my cousin by flexing and said ‘I’m the man of the house!’

My dad tried to be hairy-chested and just yelled at the TV.

He wore a shirt that said ‘I’m a beast’ and it was just a shirt.